Meditation: Today marks 1,500 days in a row of meditating |
- Today marks 1,500 days in a row of meditating
- Animal bodies
- Did my first 40 minute meditation session today!
- So I did a 1 hour meditation session and this happened...
- [HELP] I get angry and irritated easily
- When you are getting heated in an argument with a loved one, you don't have to react. You can train yourself to walk away, reflect and come back to the conversation after cooling off
- I realised why so many people (myself included) see lifting weights in the gym as meditation
- Meditation and recovery
- Finding Center
- Feeling of Fear Whilst Meditating
- "Binaural & Butyrate" meditation. In the pursuit of Surf Spirituality, the life of play imagined by Alan Watts
- Want to meditate but feel too overwhelmed by emotions
- Master of your own reality
- How Meditation is helpful with feeling of Lonelines.
- Vipassana 10-day Retreat at Texas Ashram: Recollections and Advice
- Day 1 of 60 days meditation challenge for 1 hour.
- Meditation is real well being
- Crawling out of my skin
- Something weird happened earlier when I looked in the mirror.
- Has anyone done a Vipassanā meditation retreat?
- Having a hard time distinguishing dreams from reality
- Small tip
- Can meditation help me to become more proactive? How?
- Breath as a link between the spirit and the body/mind
| Today marks 1,500 days in a row of meditating Posted: 26 Jul 2020 10:57 AM PDT I was always interested in meditation and after doing a yoga/meditation retreat in Hawaii a few years back I made it a daily habit. Was definitely life changing for me and is especially helpful with everything going on today. When I first started it was hard to find time and get committed. I would have a streak for a few days in a row and then forget the next day. I finally decided to make it a priority and would wake up extra early to specifically meditate each morning. I started to keep track of how many days in a row I could go as a fun motivator. Eventually I just stopped counting but would put milestone days in my calendar. Before I knew it I was at 100 days, then 500 then 1,000. When I first started dating my fiancé I was embarrassed to tell her I needed to do it every day and was unsure how she would react. She was super supportive cause she knew it was important to me and it was for me to just be an overall better person. She even helped remind me to do it every day. Not sure if these kinds posts are ok for here but it's just a proud accomplishment for me and wanted to share it with a community that might appreciate it/find it helpful to know that anyone can pick it up and stick with it. And to not be embarrassed about it or try to hide it from others cause they can be a great support system for you. What a long strange trip it's been for sure! Good luck everyone! Edit: wanted to caveat that keeping a streak is definitely not the most important thing. Don't want this to be misconstrued that if you miss a day you should stress out or put pressure on yourself to keep going for the sake of a streak. hope I don't add to any stigma about that! [link] [comments] |
| Posted: 26 Jul 2020 07:27 AM PDT I just had a bit of a breakthrough in meditation. Been severely struggling with suicidal ideation and self hatred. I was not able to keep up any kind of meditation practice. Well i just wanted to share in case someone else can use this to find some inner compassion (although it's probably gonna be weird to most of you). I was listening to one of Tara Brach's guided breath meditations because I've been hit by intolerable anxiety lately, and what I did while focusing on my breath, was I visualized myself from above, laying in a clearing in a forest, gentle rain hitting me, and I just realized that I have a body, it moves gently up and down with each breath, and my body is trying it's best every day to keep me alive, that there is something in there that cares about me, and it is just doing its best. That we all just have these soft animal bodies that are caring for us, and are perfect the way they are, just being. We can just be as we are. I know it sounds weird probably but it has allowed me to feel cared for, for the first time in a long time. Something I have inside me. [link] [comments] |
| Did my first 40 minute meditation session today! Posted: 26 Jul 2020 12:22 PM PDT I've been meditating on and off for a year now but stayed within the 10-20 minute mark. It has helped me with my social anxiety and with my general mood too but I felt like there was more to me had and I wanted to go a little deeper. So I decided to really push myself to not quit from frustration and did my best to keep coming back in focus on the breath and it felt so good and it actually got much easier after the 20 minute mark. I also noticed a change in the sensation of breathing, almost like there was energy radiating through my chest with every breath which helped keep me in focus even more. I felt very still and I think I will try doing 40 minutes or close to it from now on! Just wanted to share with y'all and I hope your practice has been going well. [link] [comments] |
| So I did a 1 hour meditation session and this happened... Posted: 26 Jul 2020 09:29 PM PDT During the entire session I recorded my heart rate using my Oura ring. The lowest heart rate I have ever had recorded previously was 45, and that is while I was sleeping. During this session I managed to get my heart rate down from around 70 to 39 in a matter of minutes. The feeling was out of this world. I have never felt more calm or relaxed than I did during that small window of lowered HR. When I saw the graph after the session my jaw literally dropped and I have not been able to stop thinking about it since. I started googling trying to find out more about it and I found this: https://yogasynergy.com/how-to-slow-the-heart-from-88-beats-to-32-beat-per-minute-in-45-seconds/ The author of that post describes how he achieved such a low heart rate, and it is very similar to what I did. I have tried to do it again, but to no avail. I feel it is very difficult to get the breathing in comfortably. I am actually a noob when it comes to meditation, but am curious to find out more about what it is I acutally achieved, and was wondering if someone here might have some references to interesting reads related to my experience? For reference, this is the graph from my Oura ring 'https://imgur.com/a/E87d7Au [link] [comments] |
| [HELP] I get angry and irritated easily Posted: 26 Jul 2020 11:13 PM PDT I have started meditating regularly and I noticed I get angry and irritated easily. I snap at people very often. All this didn't happen before meditating. Should I stop meditating? I started meditating hoping it would put me in a calm state but the opposite has happened. Please advice. [link] [comments] |
| Posted: 26 Jul 2020 03:27 PM PDT Sharing a home with the people we love, we can sometimes speak less kindly than we intend in moments of disagreement. When we feel anger, we can choose not to speak, allowing ourselves time to cool off. We can breathe, we can walk and we can spend time attempting to understand the circumstances that lead to the other person's point of view. Meditation is a great way for us to reaffirm our intention to speak kindly to others, to listen and to seek to relieve suffering - we can transform anger and fear into understanding, helping us to live happier, calmer lives. [link] [comments] |
| I realised why so many people (myself included) see lifting weights in the gym as meditation Posted: 26 Jul 2020 12:53 PM PDT A big part of weightlifting is the mind-muscle connection. Feeling the muscle contract, stretch and burn. That's mindfulness. So the actual gym session feels similar to that of a meditation session. Mind(ful) blown [link] [comments] |
| Posted: 26 Jul 2020 07:44 PM PDT After fighting an eating disorder for years, I had a breakthrough as I was meditating tonight: I felt myself speaking with the ED- not confronting it or fighting it, but speaking to it with compassion. I thanked it for trying so hard to protect me and forgave it for hurting me in the process. I then felt myself telling the ED that it's ok for it to leave now- I can protect myself from now on. When the ED snarled that I need it for me to me enough, I felt myself telling it: "Even if I didn't realize it before you came into my life, I have always been enough". As I was reflecting on the meditation session afterwards, I realized that I've been so stuck in my recovery because I've been actively fighting against the eating disorder, instead of acknowledging that the ED is a part of me that was just trying its best to cope with trauma. Now that the deepest part of me gave the ED compassion and permission to retire, maybe I'll finally be able to fully recover. [link] [comments] |
| Posted: 26 Jul 2020 09:17 PM PDT It's not always easy to find your center. A term used to describe a feeling you get when you've controlled all the excess energy inside you. Anxiety, insecurity, hate, fear, greed, lust, envy. All these negative emotions will cause you to lose center. When you're off center you do things that cause suffering for yourself and others. A chain of events is unleashed that seems impossible to stop. No worries. Anyone can fix it. You start by loving and accepting yourself. Entirely. Your past doesn't matter. Your "flaws" are nothing more than slight differences in shape, color, size, etc. Very much like a tree. And you wouldn't judge a tree for looking slightly different from it's neighbor. Then you start giving that same love and acceptance to everyone and everything (real and unproven) in the universe. All of it without exception. Don't give in to doubt just because you think you know what reality is. You will find when you love and accept it all, you stop trying to change it because it doesn't threaten you anymore. You realize other people are just dealing with their own things and feel they are special. Unlike anyone else, because of their differences. But we're all the same. All of of us want the security that love and acceptance provides. We want to be free to be ourselves. So stop your own chain of bad karma from being unleashed by making a decision today to love and accept yourself. Love and accept your present. Love and accept your thoughts. Love and accept people who you feel have wronged you. Show the universe some compassion and unleash a positive chain of karma for it. You deserve that in your life. I really hope you're all having a great day/night. You have my best thoughts and most sincere wishes. I do love you and accept you. [link] [comments] |
| Feeling of Fear Whilst Meditating Posted: 26 Jul 2020 05:19 PM PDT I am extremely new to meditation and have been doing it for about 6 weeks now most nights (usually for 15 minutes at 1 am before I go to bed). Last night I had a feeling of something washing over me and an uncomfortable feeling that I managed to push away before feeling "floaty". Tonight I tried to achieve the same thing and I finally did but instead I started to feel very scared and started sweating. I opened my eyes to assure myself that I was safe but I remained in the meditative state and once I became more comfortable I closed my eyes again and managed to regain the "floating" feeling before finishing. Any help/advice/explanation of this scary feeling would be greatly appreciated, thanks. [link] [comments] |
| Posted: 27 Jul 2020 02:56 AM PDT Binaural meditation can be simplicity. I am convinced that the practice of meditation is greatly assisted with the anxiolytic effect of resistant starch: https://www.reddit.com/r/Nootropics/comments/h0q4f6/resistant_corn_starch_6_months_review/ The premise is simple. The prebiotic fiber resistant starch ferments in to the short-chain fatty acid butyrate, unique fuel for much of the gut. Butyrate brings alive a whole downstream ecosystem. One interesting effect is a massive reduction in neuro-inflammation in the brain and perceived cognitive distress of all sorts. Search /r/nootropics for "starch" to read about the massive anti-anxiety effect, which could be the result of blood sugar management or long-term epigenetic modifications. The easiest product, after much research, is Jonny's Good Nature Ultra High Resistant Starch Green Banana Flour. The other threads tell you what they purchased, equally expert. Daydreaming, I would like to host and participate in a retreat "Binaural & Butyrate" It would be sessions of meditation and Ultimate Frisbee together in some type of Surf Spirituality, all of it a life of play that so interested Alan Watts [link] [comments] |
| Want to meditate but feel too overwhelmed by emotions Posted: 27 Jul 2020 01:45 AM PDT I'm very new to meditation. I've started about a month ago and it's been going pretty well. I've been able to observe my thoughts/feelings without judgement until they dissipate. In the last few days I've been under a lot of pressure. I'm very stressed because I'm about to move to a different country, but nothing seems to be going well around it. On top of this, I am going through a heartbreak as well. Today I woke up feeling depressed, hopeless, stressed. I found out that there's so much more extra steps to do besides what I originally thought and I might not be able to do them. I tried to meditate, but all I could do was get angrier and more stressed. I decided meditation would be the best as if I can just observe these feelings that go from melancholy to anger to hopelessness, I can get them to at least diminish... but as soon as I would start breathing, I would get angry at the smallest things... I've decided to focus on my breath but I would get angry because my nose was making a weird sound when exhaling. I know if something like this happens, normally you would just have to observe the sound and go with it. But I am just so pressed and overwhelmed by emotions, I don't know how to calm my mind. [link] [comments] |
| Posted: 27 Jul 2020 12:47 AM PDT |
| How Meditation is helpful with feeling of Lonelines. Posted: 26 Jul 2020 03:27 PM PDT We humans have tendency to make attachments, and specially to emotions and feelings. You won't believe, we won't only get attached to positive thoughts, but we also get attached to negative thoughts. Plus what we are trying to run away from, actually is an integral part of life. A coin has only value, when it has both sides, heads and tails. Same way life is only full when there is both negative and positive emotions. We all need to train our mind on how to deal with them, how not to get attached to these emotions and see them the way they are. I would request you to learn about your mind, how it produces thoughts and how these thoughts leads to influx of feelings and unpleasant sensations over our body. [link] [comments] |
| Vipassana 10-day Retreat at Texas Ashram: Recollections and Advice Posted: 26 Jul 2020 09:07 AM PDT Hey y'all, Here is an article I wrote on my travel site (johnnymotley.com) about a 10-day course at the ashram in Kaufman, TX. It was an incredibly positive--and equally challenging--experience, and I would love to swap recollections with others who have taken courses. Towards the end of the article, I have written down some advice for first-timers to the course. Peace, Johnny The Ashram Deep in the Heart of Texas: As a gorgeous winter afternoon unfurled, I savored the last cup of coffee I would have for a while. In an hour, I would commence the long drive from Houston to the Texan hinterland to check off a long-held item on my bucket list: a 10-day meditation retreat in silence and seclusion with Vipassana International. An old friend, who himself had completed two such retreats and was writing a Ph.D. dissertation on Tantric practices, briefed me on what was to come as we enjoyed our final cup together: "Ten days is a long time out of your life, bro. In silence, it will feel like a year. You're about to undertake some serious spiritual athletics–are you ready?" I was not ready; this would become clear in the following week and a half. In fact, I was about to attempt a marathon without training. The upcoming 12 days (it turned out that the totality of the course was longer than just 10 days, but more on that later ) alone with my mind would be one of the greatest tests of fortitude I have ever faced, a solitude that surfaced both the blessed and dark parts of my psyche. Founded in the 1970s by the late S.N. Goenka, a Burmese magnate turned guru, Vipassana International offers hundreds of courses each year in their ashrams around the world. While they strongly encourage donations at the course's conclusion (even expounding on the accompanying karmic and metaphysical boons starting on Day Eight or Day Nine), the organization provides free room, board and meditation training to thousands each year. The 10-day course is their flagship offering, but Vipassana International also holds courses as long as 30 and even 60 days, all completely free. (I heard that Noah Yuval Herari, the author of Sapiens, even did a 90-day course.) The only required cost is the gas money or airfare to arrive at the ashram. How do they afford to do this? Vipassana alumni feel that the courses open their minds and hearts so effectively that they reciprocally open their wallets to allow those in the future to experience the same. Jack Dorsey recently donated millions, as have several other Silicon Valley moguls of his ilk. I arrived at the ashram in rural Kaufman, TX to a blazing winter sunset behind bales of hay and grazing cattle, joined by about 200 soon-to-be chelas, seekers of wisdom under the tutelage of an enlightened guru–in this case, Mr. Goenka and his successors. This first day at the ashram was to be Day 0, the pre-course orientation. The course was so popular that I was initially number 55 on the waitlist; I had all but given up hope of enrolling when I received an e-mailed a week prior to the start of the course informing me that I had a spot. Many who had not cleared the waitlist still drove out to the isolated ashram before orientation, hoping for no-shows and open spots. After registering in the ashram's mess hall, I was given a small black bag and told to place my car keys, cell phone, and wallet inside; they would be returned only at the course's conclusion. The cooks, all from India, had prepared dinner–an odd yet delicious South Asian and Tex-Mex vegetarian medley: refried beans topped with paneer and served with tortillas and achar, Indian fermented mango. I overheard two guys having a conversation about ayahuasca and DMT at one of the dinner tables; I sat down to join them and introduce myself. My tablemates were a hipster-looking Indian who was an Austin-based tech entrepreneur and a well-dressed Latino who worked in real estate in New York and had flown into Dallas the same morning for the course. Both were about my age, early thirties. Immediately after the course, the tech guy was flying to Peru for a 40-day shamanic retreat in the Amazon. Halfway through dinner, a bald Indian with Sanskrit tattoos around his wrists and rudraksha beads around his neck summoned our attention over the mic. He welcomed us to the ashram and invited us to select from among ourselves one man and one woman to walk through the dormitories with a gong each morning slightly before 4 am to wake up the rest of the chelas for the morning meditation. If nobody volunteered, two participants at random would be "voluntold*"* instead. Next, he explained what the course would not be: "These ten days are not a holiday. The course is not designed as a time to relax, rest, or detox the system. This is not an opportunity for socializing or networking. Those of you who came here with any of these false expectations, we kindly invite you to leave at this moment, before we begin. Leaving the course early is akin to leaving surgery before the doctor has fully sewn you up." Some people fidgeted nervously, but nobody got up to leave. "The purpose of this course is to better understand the Dhamma, the eternal truths of impermanence, grasping, and aversion. This course is designed to help you understand suffering and how to eradicate it. Nothing more." He ran us through the daily schedule. We were to wake up at 4 am each morning and meditate in our quarters until 6 am, when breakfast–a spread of fresh fruit, bread, yogurt, tea, cereals, and, occasionally, Indian porridge–was served. Subsequent meditations were to take place in hour and hour-and-a-half long intervals as a group in the Dhamma Hall, a cavernous structure containing nothing more than floor space for sitting, a projector, and a platform for the teachers to observe us. During the breaks in the schedule, we were permitted to nap or walk through the trails in the woods around the ashram. Apart from breakfast, the only other meal of the day was a 1 pm lunch, always "pure-veg" (almost vegan but allowing for ghee and cheese) and always scrumptious South Asian fare. First-timers were allowed an optional snack of fruit, milk, and tea at 6 pm. Goenka, in his nightly posthumous talks projected in the Dhamma Hall, claimed that eating only twice per day–a slight fast–facilitated meditation. There was a long list of thou-shalt-not's: no killing of any kind (insects were to be gently released back outside); no rituals, prayers, or yogic practice apart from the techniques taught during the course; no drugs or intoxicants (medications were only accepted if accompanied by a doctor's note); no jewelry or other adornments (we were to live like monks while on the ashram); no sex or masturbation; no reading, writing, or drawing; no music; no speaking or nonverbal communication; and–most emphatically–no leaving early. Genders were to be separated at all times. Men and women would eat in separate mess halls, sleep on opposite sides of the ashram, and meditate in segregated sections of the Dhamma Hall. We even had separate nature trails for taking walks. The vows became effective immediately following the orientation. The dormitories of the ashram were surprisingly comfortable. All participants were provided with a small private room with unadorned white walls, a cot, nightstand, small closet, and an alarm clock—simple, austere quarters that reminded me of a vacant college dorm room. My mattress sagged, but after telling one of the volunteers before taking the vow of silence, it was replaced with a sturdier one the next day. The wash area contained a communal sink and individual showers and toilet stalls–also reminiscent of college. Not bad accommodations, considering I was not paying a dime. Following the orientation, we were taken to the Dhamma Hall for our first meditation instructions. A 20-year-old I had met at dinner who was an undergrad at UT Austin nearly shook with anticipation as we entered the hall. "It's really starting," he whispered to himself. His assigned seat was directly in front of mine, and I would study the back of his neck in between meditations. On Day Three or Four, he was conspicuously absent. Like some others, he couldn't take it and left early. Sharpening the Mind and Scanning the Body: Days One, Two, and Three were spent honing a meditation technique known as anapana, a preparation for the main event of vipassana. Anapana meditation entailed focusing on the sensation of the breath passing over the tiniest imaginable point directly between the nose and the upper lip. The first third of the entire course was dedicated to anapana; hours and hours each day focused on the upper lip. It was mind-numbingly boring; but eventually, I understood why we were doing it. By Day Four, my concentration had become razor sharp; I could focus my mind on that tiny point like a laser beam. This newfound concentration, a state Goenka referred to as samadhi, would facilitate the body-scanning of vipassana. During breakfast each day a schedule was posted at the buffet line. On Day Four it read, "Today is Vipassana Day." The pre-lunch meditation session in the Dhamma Hall was two hours instead of the usual one hour; the instructors stated that we must stay in the Dhamma Hall for the entire two hours, no matter what. The vipassana technique–which Goenka claimed Siddartha Gautama, the Buddha, had employed to achieve Enlightenment–turned out to be deceptively simple, just mentally scanning the body from head to toe and then back again, over and over. Sensations on the body, pleasant or unpleasant, were to be acknowledged but not fixated upon. The important part was to keep the awareness moving: up and down, down and up, taking stock of each centimeter of the body. As taught in Transcendental Meditation, thoughts and emotions were to be noticed but gently jettisoned. This simple practice of observing sensations on the body without reacting to them was, according to Goenka, the first-step towards accepting and internalizing the truth of the impermanence of all existence, a crucial step in the journey towards Enlightenment. As we practiced vipassana, the instinct to grasp at or repel stimuli, one of the deepest layers of the mind, would be slowly "reprogrammed." We would come to understand, on a subconscious and conscious level, that we did not have to allow our minds to become entangled with sensations, whether they be emotions, physical feelings, or thoughts. Why dwell on any sensations if they were just arising and passing? As the course progressed, we were told to increase the speed with which we scanned our bodies, eventually gaining the prowess to sweep the whole body within just seconds. We met with a teacher once every other day or so in private, and this meeting was the only time speaking, albeit in an extremely limited manner, was permitted. The senior practitioner would inquire about how the practice was progressing and if such sensation or frustration was being experienced. The chela was permitted to voice any questions or concerns he might have. My meetings invariably ended with the teacher, a strapping Indian man with flowing hair who looked like he had just teleported from the Himalayas, saying, "Good, good. Now, keep practicing." After Day Three or Four, as Goenka predicted in his videos, I began to question my reasons for taking the course. I lamented that I could have chosen to spend my winter break on a beach in Central America, having the time of my life, but instead opted to self-flagellate in an ashram. I asked myself several times a day if I should cut my losses and leave early. Even though several veterans of the course with whom I had spoken had advised me to fight through this stage and stay until the end, I fantasized constantly about upping and leaving. My parked car was visible from the front of the ashram–it would be so easy to grab my stuff and bounce; I could spend the rest of my break goofing off in Austin. Days Five and Six were the peak of the frustration and second-guessing. Starting around Day Three, Goenka announced that we were to embrace adhitthana, the Buddhist virtue of strong determination, during our hour-long sits. Adhitthana entailed refraining from any movement whatsoever while sitting; we were to remain still as statues on our hard meditation cushions. If your lower back started to burn from exertion or you wanted to rip into your own flesh to scratch an itch, well, too bad–suck it up and sit still until the gong rings. The first few days of applying adhitthana were akin to torture. After 30 minutes of meditation, about halfway through a standard sit, the muscles in my back screamed at me to shift positions and release tension. My feet were so numb and restricted from blood flow that I thought I was inducing edema. Goenka's advice: just observe and accept the pain without trying to change it; understand that painful sensations, like all sensations, are merely fleeting. He emphasized that we were to use the pain as a teaching tool: to drive home the Buddhist foundational teaching that all is impermanent and that grasping and aversion are misguided. The pain was to be observed and acknowledged with the same dispassion as pleasurable sensations and thoughts. The stimuli we encountered, while meditating or during any other facet of existence, could not be controlled, but we could completely control our reaction to them. To my amazement, this approach really worked. When my muscles started to scream in agony, I reminded myself that I did not have to react. The pain could only bother me if I allowed it to, when I permitted myself to crave relief and repel the unpleasant feelings. I thought of self-immolating Tibetan monks; tragic and horrific figures though they are, they indeed remain still and calm as they burn to death. Armed with this new approach of accepting pain, the hour-long sessions became easy, even enjoyable. Advanced vipassana meditators experience the sensation of bodily dissolution, what in Pali, the Sanskrit-derived language of Buddhism, is called bhanga. As the meditator's awareness becomes more and more sensitive, he realizes that the sensations on his body, down to the tiniest level, are in a constant state of flux. In other words, there is no solid matter, only changing sensations. Goenka, in his nightly fireside video chats, described this advanced state of meditation during the tail-end of the course, reminding us not to dwell on it if we were fortunate enough to experience it and not to grasp for it if we didn't. Bhanga, Goenka made clear, was indeed a blissful, deeply peaceful state of consciousness, but, as with other sensations, it was to be simply acknowledged and gently put aside. It was by no means the goal of the meditation. He reminded us that the important part was to keep the attention moving up and down and to dispassionately observe. I myself did not experience dissolution, but I was told by some vipassana repeaters that it usually takes a couple of 10-day spins to achieve it. During the first days of the retreat, the din in my head had intensified as if placed inside a pressure cooker. The drunken, wasp-stung, monkey of my mind howled and flailed in absolute rebellion as I tried to subdue it. Uneasiness and anxiety gave way to chiaroscuro by Day Three or Four; anger, regret, and nostalgia bubbled up, as well as the rays of light of gratitude, a keener awareness of beauty, and deep love for certain people. As I walked through the wooded trails in silence, I planned exactly how I would handle life's problems post-retreat; I played out conversations I would have in the coming weeks. But, by Day Eight, I was no longer spinning my mind's tires in the mud. I was fully present: savoring my food and daily shower, marveling at the sunset and the beauty of the woods, and finding joy and fulfillment in the hour-long sits. Halfway through Day Four, I cried. A painful memory I had not fully processed come to the fore, and the emotions were released. It was the catharsis I had needed for several weeks, and I felt lighter afterwards. By the penultimate day of the course, the rollercoaster had run its course; now, I was gently sailing on a surreally beautiful and placid sea, with the sun and breeze at my back. By Day Nine, there was a collective sense of elation flowing through the Dhamma Hall that the long contest of spiritual endurance was drawing to a close. Whereas I had been unable to let go of my worries and concerns during the first half of the course, the battles, victories, and defeats of my life back in Houston now seemed far away, almost irrelevant. My mind, weaned off its craving for dopamine-soaked stimulation, was as calm as I could remember it ever being. I made mental lists of the activities I looked forward to doing post-retreat: brewing coffee in the morning, sipping a beer in the evening, cooking, hitting the gym, maybe traveling in the near future. These pleasures, which I had consumed thoughtlessly and taken for granted, now seemed akin to the delights of heaven. Day Eight or Nine was also when Goenka introduced metta meditation, the practice of extending loving-kindness, another chief Buddhsit virtue along with addhitanna, to the entirety of creation. Likening the course again to psychic surgery, Goenka compared metta meditation to the balm that the nurse puts on the incision after it has been sewn up. The metta meditation would prepare us for the shock of reentry into the world. Metta meditation really did amplify the deep sentiments of gratitude, peace, and joy that seemed to arise naturally after ten days of meditation, fasting, and deprivation. Waking up on Day 10 felt like waking up on Christmas morning as a kid. For better or worse, I was electrified with anticipation to break the silence, to return to the world. After the typical hour-long sit before lunch, we were told that the silence would be broken at lunch. I expected some kind of ceremony, but there was none. After the meditation, I went for my usual walk through the nature trails and encountered some other participants. It was not lunch yet, but we spoke anyway, congratulating each other on completing the course. Whoa….it was bizarre to hear my voice again, to feel my vocal cords move. As I spoke more, I pondered the weird fact that what I said often came from somewhere unconscious; how my mind usually didn't really know exactly what would come out of my mouth before I actually spoke. I have no idea why, but I cracked up laughing for the first few minutes of renewed speech. There was one more surprise at the end of course: it was not really the end of the course; we were required to stay another full day to help with clean-up. Just as the day we arrived at the ashram was not really Day 1, Day 10 was not really the departure day. Counting the bookends, the full vipassana course is a 12-day affair. Not being able to leave at the hour I hoped for was a mild blueball, but the buffer time of being at the ashram easing back into speaking was helpful. The teachers and veteran participants, one who had completed seven 10-day courses, advised us to reacclimate slowly, to ease back into the chaos that awaited us outside. When I did resume normal life, things were different, at least for a while. The mindfulness and appreciation of the present moment lingered like an afterglow. I felt as if somebody had taken a wipe to my mind and my five senses. I marveled anew at the beauty of the world: the deliciousness of good food, the intoxication of love and human touch, the sublime mysteries glimpsed while looking at a sunset or starry sky. The ruckus and stress of normal life took some getting used to as well. For a few days, I wanted to avoid excess conversation, crowds, and over-stimulating situations. I knew I shouldn't go back to drinking for a few days, but I ended road tripping through the Southwest right after the retreat and could not resist the good beer along the way. We were advised to continue practicing vipassana for two-hours each day upon returning home, a commitment I failed to uphold. While I did go back to regular meditation each day, I stuck with Transcendental Meditation, the practice I had already been doing for years. Advice for first-timer vipassana students: So, what's my advice for those going into a course? Prepare yourself in advance for the hard and steep path ahead. As much as possible, reduce life's volume in the days and weeks prior. The calmer you are at the outset, the fewer days it will take to facilitate a placid mind and deep meditations. I was putting out fires before going into the course–crises in my personal and professional lives–and these stressors continued to hector me for the first half of the course. It was only in the last few days that I was able to quiet these bogies and let go. I had been advised to abstain from general debauchery for a week or two leading up to the course. I ignored these suggestions, to my detriment. (The day I was to leave for the ashram, I woke up in a strange bed with a horrific hangover.) This lack of discipline and self-restraint in the days leading up to the course detracted from my overall experience. You don't need to go full-blown renunciate (there will be plenty of time for that at the ashram), but it's wise to resist the siren calls of Tinder, the bar, and so forth. I know for a fact I would have gone deeper if I had had more discipline going into the course. At the time of writing these recollections, five or six months have passed since the retreat. It's hard to say if the course wrought lasting changes in my life. I would not go so far as to say it was transformative. However, the course did offer me well-needed time to reflect, to process the highs and lows of the past year—even the past decades. During the days of silence, I connected dots and gained insights about my life and relationships. Although explicitly admonished not to expect rejuvenation, the course was tonifying: the endless chatter in my mind stopped; I rooted out unproductive cycles of thought; I even felt physically more robust from the prolonged fasting and ayurvedic diet. Perhaps most importantly, I proved to myself that I have the mettle to endure deprivation and austerity. I know I can survive without stimulation; that I can sit utterly still for an hour or more, ignoring the pain; that I can find fulfillment in the simplest pleasure and beauties. All in all, I am glad I did the course, and one day–probably in a few years–I intend to complete another one. [link] [comments] |
| Day 1 of 60 days meditation challenge for 1 hour. Posted: 26 Jul 2020 09:04 AM PDT I have been meditating for like two months now. Initially I felt calm, mindful,happy but after 30 days it seemed like it's not working anymore, so I decided to do 1 hour a day. ⌚Time -6.30 pm Opened eyes at 45 and 56 to check the time passed. 🧠Random thoughts one after another, felt agitated in the middle of the session. I decided not to focus on anything and let my mind wander and thoughts were coming one after another just like the waterfall. And after one hour I was at peace. [link] [comments] |
| Posted: 26 Jul 2020 08:18 PM PDT meditation enhances the person's sense of well being by evoking inner resources.These resources in turn let one experience that what is to be,already is. [link] [comments] |
| Posted: 26 Jul 2020 08:04 PM PDT I very recently started to consistently meditate. In the past, I tried doing it on and off. About 5 minutes into each session, I suddenly feel a deep itching sensation...it feels like I need to crawl out of my skin and it increases and increases until I finally move. It's the identical feeling of "emotional itch" I get when I do hip openers in yoga, especially leaning forwards in a butterfly pose. Any ideas on what this is and any tips? I sometimes can ride it out, but it comes in waves until I'm clenching my jaw and it's unbearable. [link] [comments] |
| Something weird happened earlier when I looked in the mirror. Posted: 26 Jul 2020 08:05 AM PDT I went to the bathroom, and after doing my thing and washing my hands, I looked up, and sort of "accidentaly" made eye contact with myself. It didn't feel weird at first, but for some reason I couldn't really look away. Or maybe I could but regardless, I didn't. After a couple of seconds something changed. It was gradual, but still very quick. It felt like I wasn't looking at myself anymore. Imagine suddenly finding yourself staring a stranger in the eye in your bathroom alone at night. That's what it felt like. It scared me a littke but it was also intriguing, so I decided to maintain eye contact. I moved my head from side to side a bit. The feeling of "unrelation" intensified. I broke eye contact and started inspecting the rest of my face. Moved my head around a bit, looked at my features. All the while it felt like I was looking at someone else. I felt like, "maybe this is what it feels like for most animals to see their reflection?" It was extremely trippy. Eventually I started leaving the bathroom while still checking the mirror. My kitchen is right next to the bathroom and I actually had to shut the door because I kept having this creepy sensation that the guy in the mirror was watching me. But also super confused because I know that guy is me. Eventually while I was making dinner the feeling slowly faded. I hadn't taken any alcohol or drugs of any form. I hadn't eaten a lot at the time, and I cycled over 30 kms yesterday, so my body is pretty tired, but other than that, nothing out of the ordinary. This sub talks a lot about the self, and sometimes things like astral projection/out of body experiences. Has anybody felt something like this ever? Edit: I should state that I don't believe in anything supernatural. I believe whatever it was, was some kind of psychological phenomena (or a combination of more than one). [link] [comments] |
| Has anyone done a Vipassanā meditation retreat? Posted: 26 Jul 2020 11:35 PM PDT Participating in a ten day Vipassanā retreat is on my list of things to do when Covid clears up- and was curious about people's' experiences if they have gone to one. Is there anything I can/should do to prepare myself? I was thinking of having my own one day "retreat" at home. Any tips, suggestions, advice are much appreciated! [link] [comments] |
| Having a hard time distinguishing dreams from reality Posted: 26 Jul 2020 09:32 AM PDT I started meditating daily since March. Not sure if this is a result of meditation, but I've been having very vivid, realistic dreams lately and sometimes throughout the day, a dream I had the night before would pop up in my head that would leave me confused for a few seconds while I try to remember whether it was in fact a dream or whether it actually happened. This sounds confusing, but hope it makes sense. Has anyone else experienced this? [link] [comments] |
| Posted: 26 Jul 2020 01:14 PM PDT If you are devoted to meditation, you have to try everything in your power to meet the recommended water consumption per day. This alone is life changing. You are 70% water, nourish your body if you want it sharp and relaxed. Fluidity is a very core aspect of meditation, and what better fluid is there but water [link] [comments] |
| Can meditation help me to become more proactive? How? Posted: 26 Jul 2020 12:16 PM PDT So im a lazy person, i want to change this i want to be more proactive on my life, im struggling at university because of my laziness and i want this to change. The main cause of this habit id say is because i had anaemia almost my whole infancy and after i got better stuff didnt change too much for me [link] [comments] |
| Breath as a link between the spirit and the body/mind Posted: 26 Jul 2020 10:34 PM PDT I've heard this in the meditation context that breath is the link between your consciousness and subconscious. Today I felt it during meditation that my spirit was calm and the breath had to be slow and steady for my spirit, but my heart was beating fast and demanded my breath to faster. Did anybody experience this? How do you bring your body to pace when you want to? [link] [comments] |
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